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Lisa Simony wrote:

Hi, Mike —

I attended a women's retreat this past week led by a spiritual director and Catholic sister.

In one of our sharing exercises, we recalled a time we felt rooted and grounded in love. I said
I felt rooted and grounded in the love of God. The Sister had suggested that everyone can say this, because everyone feels this; it was a given.

Although I have at times felt God's love, I don't feel it on an ongoing basis and this is what I'd like to talk with you about.

I am a confirmed Catholic, but that was as a very young person. I was about eleven. I have struggled with my faith ever since. I'm 30 now and don't really have that firm sense of belief. I feel that God should love me less because I fail to fully believe in His Son.

  • What do you think about this?
  • And, after so many years of doubt, how can I strengthen my faith?

Thank you.

Sincerely,

Lisa

  { What do you suggest if I don't really believe in God and sense He shouldn't be loving me as much? }

Mike replied:

Hi, Lisa —

Thanks for the question.

So the whole team can pitch in, next time I suggest you use the main page to ask a question.

First, I'd like to commend you on your desire to strengthen your faith; I wish more Catholics had this attitude.

To start, let's talk about God's love for us. As my previous pastor told us, God is madly in love with us, yes, even when we are sinning, he loves us. Nevertheless, he loves us to much to keep us in any sinful habits we are holding on to.

It's important to remember when we pray to God we are not praying to someone who doesn't understand where we are coming from, but we are praying to Our Lord Jesus, True God and True Man. Jesus was, and is, a man like us in all things but sin, so whether we are a man or woman, He understands our doubts, struggles (both physical and spiritual), temptations and desires.
When we partake in the Eucharist, he is right there with us in our struggles as we carry our given cross. On the issue of belief, Blessed John Henry Newman once said:

Ten thousand difficulties do not make one doubt.

You said:

  • What do you think about this?

We all have a calling in the Church to serve and believe.

To discern our calling in the Church, prayer is key. I recommend praying the Rosary on a daily basis. You can Google for a free one on-line by using the search words "Free Rosary" in quotes.
If your parish has Adoration, I would encourage you to participate in that as well. Adoration can
be one of the most important places where we grow in the faith because, unlike evangelization, where we share Jesus' Church with others, in Adoration, the Lord places things on our mind as a response to various issues and crosses we bring to the chapel or Church.

Find out what ministries your parish has then contemplate:

  • Which one of these ministries would you enjoy doing:
    • for your own enjoyment, and
    • for the Church?

You said:

  • And, after so many years of doubt, how can I strengthen my faith?

By practicing and knowing your faith.

On practicing the faith:

Out of 168 hours in the week, all the Lord asks of us, most weeks, is one hour and, though we may not have a desire to go to Sunday Mass, it's for our own good because receiving the Eucharist, as well as keeping a daily prayer life, will help us make good, holy choices for that week. The bishops have also recommended that Catholic families make it a habit to receive the Sacrament of Confession on a monthly basis; I agree!

Living a sacramental life is the key to strengthening your faith rapidly.

On knowing the faith:

I would start with reading the sections in the Catechism on faith, hope and charity. These are the three theological virtues. As you grow in the faith, remember that ones faith is not based on how one feels.

Catholics should believe in the Catholic Church, not because it makes them feel good, but because they believe it is the truth-telling Church that Jesus founded on St. Peter and His successors.
For other sources where you can learn the faith, check out our recommended reading page.

My suggested reading would include the Catechism, the Compendium and the writings of the Early Church Fathers: [choice 1] [choice 2]; these are saints who lived from 100 A.D. to 850 A.D.

Yes, they were Catholic too!

A subscription to Catholic Answers magazine would also be wise.

I hope this helps,

Mike

Eric replied:

Lisa,

Faith is not about feeling. Ignore feelings; you can't rely on them.

If you approach the spiritual life by pursuing good feelings, you'll never get anywhere.

As for faith, faith is a gift. Ask for it in prayer. Open your heart to receive it, and open your heart to Christ. You can pray the Agnostic's Prayer if you wish:

"O my God, if there is a God, save my soul, if I have a soul."

The key is openness: Openness to doing what Christ wills and following him if, in fact, he is the true God. I think if you ask for Him sincerely, you will receive Him. It might not be in the way you expect — demanding that God perform in some specific way never works — but I think He will respond to a soul that seeks Him in humility.

Eric

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