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WantingSomeAnswers wrote:

Hi, guys —

  • What should I do?

I think same-sex marriage is fine. I think some people are just born that way and should be true to themselves. I think they should do whatever makes them happy. I want to be close to God but I'm confused about this.

  • Isn't it wrong to judge others?
  • Can't people who love each other be productive, loving members of society, no matter who it is they love?

I'm a huge Lance Bass fan, (the member of NSYNC who came out as gay), and I think he is a wonderful person. He's helped so many people be who they are and find peace within themselves. I know he's not Catholic, but he is Christian. I don't think it's okay to preach, well, I guess, hate.

  • Is Catholicism not right for me?

My family would be devastated if I went to a different church. I just can't imagine God would frown upon two people loving each other who happened to be the same gender.

  • What should I do?

I really want to do the right thing. I guess, as long as we follow the rules of the Church we go to, we'll go to Heaven and God will love us. I just want to do the right thing and I think same-sex marriage is okay and I'll always accept same-sex couples and gay people.

WantingSomeAnswers

  { Can't people of the same sex who love each other be productive, loving members of society? }

Mike replied:

Dear WantingSomeAnswers.

Thanks for the questions.

I think between Bob's answer to one of your questions and my answer to another, we have answered everything so I'll just comment on what I may have missed.

If there are any questions you believe we have not answered, just ask again using the AskUs quick link:

https://www.AskACatholic.com/AskUs

You said:

  • Isn't it wrong to judge others?

There is nothing wrong with judging. Even Jesus in the Scriptures states:

6 “Do not give what is holy to dogs; and do not throw your pearls before swine, or they will trample them under foot and turn and maul you. (Matthew 7:6)

That means we have to discern or make judgments of what is holy and what is not holy.

What we can't do is impute guilt for a specific reason on a person. Only God and that person knows why:

  • a person was motivated to steal
  • a person killed another person, or
  • a person knowingly or unknowingly got involved in a same sex lifestyle which is obviously contrary to the Gospels.

You said:

  • Can't people who love each other be productive, loving members of society, no matter who it is they love?

Sure they can!, but people have immortal souls. This means that were created to be productive beyond the material world in which they live in. They were created to be productive in a supernatural way for the supernatural world to come — created to do what all men and all women do naturally: pro-create. Procreation is in our DNA.

Those who have chosen a same-sex lifestyle want to deny the supernatural procreative powers Almighty God has blessed them with. What they call love, is not love — it's self-pleasuring [and/or] using another person to maximize procreative pleasures that were intended to bring forth new life. Both men and women were also created with what I call a hierarchy of pleasures. This posting explains that issue:

You said:
I don't think it's okay to preach, well, I guess, hate.

The Church doesn't preach hate; She preaches truth. The reason why you think She preaches hate is because the news media, mainstream media, and the LGBT groups who hate the Church are telling you this, along with:

  • your uncatechized Catholic friends, and
  • their parents who were never taught or trained to appreciate the Catholic faith which they inherited from their parents.

As I said in another question that I answered:

There is no such thing as gay marriage. The term, gay marriage, in my opinion,
is Christian hate speech and I think it is sad that there are no laws on the books barring the use of such a term. Marriage is a Christian term. It is a Catholic sacrament. To allow our culture to re-define our own term is not right.

You said:

  • Is Catholicism not right for me?

It depends on your age and whether you value the eternal issues beyond this life.

  • If you are under 18, as my brother Mark has told his four kids:

      "As long as you live under my roof, you obey my rules and morals."

  • If you are older than 18 and live independently from your parents, you have to choose between the false Christ's and false Gospels, St. Paul and Jesus warned you about and the faith of the Catholic Church He choose to entrust to St. Peter and his successors.

In a previous question you asked:

  • How can I be sure that there is a Heaven and not just a fade to black?

By having faith. Without faith there is no logical reason not to expect a fade to black.

CCC 166 Faith is a personal act - the free response of the human person to the initiative of God who reveals himself. But faith is not an isolated act. No one can believe alone, just as no one can live alone. You have not given yourself faith as you have not given yourself life. The believer has received faith from others and should hand it on to others.

There is nothing wrong with struggling to understand a specific teaching but if you truly are not interested in learning (the what and why) and accepting (the what and why), I can't help you. You have made your choice.

If you are interested in learning (the what and why) and accepting (the what and why), once you understand all the reasoning behind how our bodies were designed for the opposite sex and the necessity of traditional marriage in sustaining our culture and civilization, certainly don't shun your gay and lesbian friendships but don't condone their behavior either.

Use your friendship as an opportunity share with them why Christian marriage is important and the dangerous health issues related to same-sex activity. This is something you should want to do if you truly love them, in the true sense of the word love. Encourage them to join you at Sunday Mass once in a while, even if they can't receive the Blessed Sacrament. No one will ask for their Catholic card :)

You said:
My family would be devastated if I went to a different church. I just can't imagine God would frown upon two people loving each other that happen to be the same gender.

As I said that other reply:

  • How are you defining love?

in a sacrificial, total self-giving manner, or
in a self-pleasuring manner? — which is not love

  • Which type of love do you think Jesus sees as love?
  • Which type of love did He display on the Cross?

I hope this helps,

Mike

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