Deborah,
I would encourage you to keep pursuing the Catholic Faith; that is the Holy Spirit that is leading you. Second, pray for your parents, and even make sacrifices for them, (i.e. fasting).
If you are unable to be independent at this point:
- use the internet to find good Catholic sources
- maybe watch Mass on live stream, and
- if you can make connections with Catholics your age, in your area, you could build up a network of support.
A good priest would be instrumental in this as well for personal advice and council, and a path to a sacramental life when the circumstances provide.
So as long as you are dependent on your parents you must obey them to a large degree, and always respect and honor them, because God gave us a commandment to that effect. That being said, at some point, you will be responsible for your own free agency as an adult, and God desires, and even demands, that we all are obedient to Him — even when it comes into conflict with family and others, so be patient and work towards your own emancipation. Above all, be loving and faithful to God first, parents second, and you will do well.
Lastly, I think the best prayer you can do on your own at this time is the Rosary. You can pray it on your fingers or (if you have a set of Rosary beads, great, but it is not necessary). Outside of Holy Mass, this is the most powerful prayer, and the Blessed Mother is your best ally. You need a mother's love when you struggle, so turn to her.
She was there for Jesus, and she will be there for us.
Pentecostals don't have a devotion to Mary, and likely they consider having a devotion to her as idolatry, but they don't understand Catholic Teachings and Catholic practices (small t, traditions) correctly.
Mary is a gift to us, from her Son Jesus. A very human mother, who has become the best example of God's grace in action. She is:
- truly blessed by grace
- an awesome prayer partner
- a loving mother, and
- a great advocate with her Son, and our Father, and the Holy Spirit, whom she knows intimately — since He worked in her to make the Word become Flesh, the Flesh for the sacrifice that saved humanity.
Yeah, that's Mary, our Mother. Take the gift.
Peace,
Bob Kirby
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