Dear C. J. —
A mortal sin requires:
- knowledge of
what you are doing
- knowledge that
it is grievously wrong, and
- full
consent of the will.
Many people
are deceived about the nature of
the child or the abortion, (and/or)
make a decision in a panic or under
duress.
In any case, any woman having an
abortion knows that she is preventing
her future child from being born,
even if she is, for some reason,
unaware that she has a child at the
time of the abortion. Only you know
your degree of culpability.
Abortion's effects, however, do not
respect guilt. Whether one's abortion
was physically coerced or freely
chosen, most mothers react to the
event as to a trauma. There are many
effects of abortion and they do
not resolve until the underlying
relationships are resolved, primarily
the relationships with the child
and with God. Even reconciliation
with God doesn't give peace until
one reconciles with the child.
You don't need to tell your RCIA teacher, but you really should look
up your diocese's Project
Rachel ministry which will confidentially
help you find full recovery. You
will find that Project Rachel has
specially trained priests and counselors,
and, generally, it has programs daily,
weekly or on the weekend that take
you through the basic aspects of
recovery, which is something you
cannot do alone.
Mary Ann
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