You said:
The Bible is God's Word but I don't see anything where:

• it says Mary was sinless, or that
• she was taken into Heaven without dying or being resurrected.

It's not in Scripture. It's part of Tradition. People who knew her, handed down these truths. Actually though, whether she died, or not, is an open question; the Assumption, the teaching you describe, does not say whether she died or not.

The Bible is God's written Word, but it is also God's Oral Word:

• "Hold fast to the traditions which you received, whether by word of mouth or by letter."
  (2 Thessalonians 2:15)
• "The grass withers and the flowers fail, but the word of the Lord stands forever. And this is the word that was preached to you." (1 Peter 1:25)
• "Watch out for those who cause divisions and put obstacles in your way that are contrary to the teaching you have learned." (Romans 16:17)
• "Keep away from every brother who does not live according to the teaching you received from us." (2 Thessalonians 3:6)
• "Earnestly contend for the faith once for all entrusted to the saints." (Jude 3)
• "Church of the living God", "which is the pillar and foundation of the truth."
  (1 Timothy 3:15)

You said:
The Bible is God's Word but I don't see anything where:

• she was a virgin all of her life.
  
  
• How could she ever be married to Joseph, and how could Joseph not desire the human aspect of life?

Who said he didn't desire it? <He just didn't fulfill it.>

Tradition tells us that he was a widower and was older in years, which explains why he was not mentioned, as Mary was, in Jesus' ministry.

He married Mary in order to take care of her in her vow of virginity (also recorded by tradition), which was not uncommon at the time. After all, women in that society could not support themselves. He was in no different a situation than any other widower, except he had an additional child to take care of.

A lot of people, who have an intense desire, or maybe even a compulsion for sex, make the assumption that everyone else must have an equally strong desire or compulsion. This is not true. Joseph could have easily lived a life with Mary without sex, especially if he had lived an ordinary married life before. I, myself, am perfectly happy living life without sex. Sex is very good, but one can live without it.

You said:
At each Mass do you go back in time:

• as though you are in the presence of what was taking place at the Cross . . .

Yes. You see, Christ was our Passover sacrifice (1 Corinthians 5:7). The Passover involved killing a sheep, spreading its blood on the doorposts, and eating its roasted flesh. Jesus' death on the Cross fulfills the sacrifice of the lamb, but it still remains for the lamb's flesh to be ritually eaten. This is what happens in the Eucharist: the flesh of the sacrificed Lamb of God is made present for us to consume so that our sins may be forgiven. Through the Eucharist, we partake of the Tree of Life.

No.

This is what previous Catholic sources have said on the issue:

You said:
I am married to a Catholic, and as you can guess, this is not a good topic for discussion. I was married the first time 28 years to a Catholic who became my ex—.

I was told, when two of my babies died at birth, that if they were not baptized, they would not go to Heaven.

• What man can change that?

You were misinformed. If you intended to have them baptized, they were as good as baptized. God doesn't say:

"Whoops! I took them from you before you had a chance to have them baptized!
Ha, ha, ha!
I won't let them into Heaven now!"

Some people think the doctrine of Baptism of desire was invented by Vatican II. It wasn't.

It's been around since the beginning.

Hope this helps,

Eric

Alexandra,

I just wanted to add to what Eric wrote:

Mary's Assumption typifies what will happen to those who are in Christ when He returns. Also, odds are this happened after Scripture was complete.

We also have a Biblical precedent:

• Enoch walked with God and God took him. (Genesis 5:24, Hebrews 11:5)
• In 2 Kings 2:11, we see that Elijah was taken up to Heaven.
• There are also verses that allude to Moses being taken up to Heaven as well.

So it's not like the doctrine of the Assumption violates any principle in Scripture.

Further, many early Church Fathers reference Revelation Chapter 12 as pertaining to Mary's Assumption.

With regards to your two babies, as Eric wrote:
You [probably] were misinformed. — or more likely received a bad explanation.

You must remember that doctrine does not change, but our understanding develops as the Holy Spirit illuminates Holy Mother Church. So man can't change anything, nor does God for that matter, but God can deepen our understanding.

The Church never really dealt with this issue to any great extent. Some theologians promoted the idea of Limbo, where innocent, unbaptized children went. This was supposed to be a place where the children were happy, felt no pain, but never had the fullness of God's presence. The Church never accepted this as a doctrine but, because it fell into the realm of theological opinion,
She never did much to suppress it either.

As the question became more pronounced, the Church, relying on Sacred Scripture and Tradition, and led by the Holy Spirit, defined the matter further.

I would actually go further than Eric and say that those babies would be in Heaven regardless of the parent's intention to baptized.

Although still stained by original sin, they certainly were far from any age of reason where they could have committed personal sin.

It is presumed that if someone does not know of the necessity of Baptism, but would be baptized if he knew it was necessary, there is an implicit Baptism of Desire. An innocent child has no knowledge of these things, thus one could almost assume a Baptism of Desire on the child's part regardless of the parent's desire.

Further the Holy Father has clarified that aborted children, are in Heaven, by virtue of their martyrdom.

Following that logic, the doctrine should extend to infants who die prior to Baptism.

Hope this helps,

John DiMascio