Hi, Alexandra —

Thanks for the question.

I admire your desire to learn your faith and to do what is good. Wine is good. The effects of wine are good — in moderation. If we purposely drink to impair our rational faculties, to "lose control", that is grievously wrong. If we can anticipate that our drinking will put us or others in physical or moral danger, then it would be wrong. If we drink for the good, social and physical effects of wine, that is good: "Wine gladdens the heart", helps the body, and facilitates social intercourse.

As for "tipsy" — it depends on what you mean. I understand tipsy to mean a bit physically unstable — as in creating the impression that one could be "tipped" off balance quite easily. Generally, for a lady, "tipsy" is:

• not attractive
• is unseemly
• causes embarrassment to friends and family, and
• can give a tad of scandal.

So that would be a venial sin, or nothing at all, if circumstances crept up on you, e.g., no food and a wine that is stronger than usual. Generally, a woman cannot process "a few glasses of wine" except over several hours.

So a lot depends on how much, under what conditions, where, when, with whom, etc. I would suggest that you stop drinking for a little while, and then notice how one glass of wine affects you, then two, three, etc. You might realize you were overlooking strong effects. It is wonderful to drink wine and spirits with family and close friends, always in moderation. Our family has one alcoholic, and we have found that when he is with us, and we don't have wine with dinner, we have just as much fun and our conversation is just as good as ever, even better!

As for learning your Catholic faith, buy a Catechism. An RCIA program can give fellowship, but it cannot give as much formation as you are looking for, and some don't give hardly any at all! Ask the DRE (Director of Religious Education) what she thinks about the Catechism and you might find out something valuable about the program!

God bless you!

Mary Ann

Hi, Alexandra —

I would just add that the Scriptures teach us to not to be drunk with wine, but to be filled with the Spirit. (Ephesians 5:18) St. Paul wrote that not everything is sin, but not everything is useful. (1 Corinthians 6:12)

So circumstance and situation play a role in our Christian life. For instance, I have friends who are alcoholics so I never drink around them. As a Christian brother, I don't want to be a source of temptation for them.

As Catholics, we need to transcend the "world of don't do this or that" to the "world of do this and that". In other words, we should look to the positive things we can do and how they affect our fellow man. In these matters, we must let our faith form our conscience.

I once counseled a single woman who strived to live a celibate life. She had a friend who was trying to do so as well. This second woman, the friend, had a problem controlling her sexuality after having a couple drinks or beers. Both of these women were in the habit of going out on Friday night to a local pub. Neither one would have the intention of committing sexual immoral acts, but more often than not, the second woman would have that second drink, and well, we don't need a road map.

So in this case, not only should the second woman avoid going to bars, but I counseled the first woman not to take the other one out for drinks.

• Now was any of this sin?

I'm not going to judge. Suffice it to say, we should be on guard for the "wiles" and "snares" of the devil. If you don't want to get wet, don't go walking in the rain.

Our personal behavior affects others, so we should be careful not to cause a brother or sister to stumble. But hey, it's Cinco de Mayo today, so enjoy that marguerita or Corona.

God Bless,

John DiMascio