Daisy
wrote:
|
|
Hi, guys —
I am a young adult and I am in the beginning
stages of a relationship with a divorced man
with kids. We have been friends for a couple
years, but he is just recently divorced. My
parents are completely against my relationship
with him, even at the friendship level. They
say, especially my mom, they want me to be
with someone without baggage but
they have never met him and I feel he is being
judged unfairly.
- I don't plan on getting in a serious relationship
or rushing into anything with him soon,
but would it ever even be possible for
me, a Catholic, to marry him, a divorced
Lutheran?
If not, I would probably end things now to
spare both him and I the hardship of the thoughts
of what could have been. The whole
situation is just wearing me down; I'm being
tugged two different ways.
Thank you for your time!
Any advice would be appreciated.
Daisy
|
| {
Should a young Catholic be concerned about the onset of a rapport with a divorced man
with kids? }
|
|
Mary
Ann replied:
|
Daisy,
There are many red flags in the relationship,
from the great age differential,
to the fact of a married man with
children having a young female friend.
You may bear some moral responsibility
for the breakup of his family. The
Church teaches that we must avoid
the occasions of sin, and keeping
company with a married man, or for
him, to keep company with you, is
definitely an occasion of sin.
- If you are not in a serious relationship
with him (and what does that mean,
anyway),
why even contemplate
the complications and grief of
stepchildren, ex-wives, and an
invalid marriage?
The marriage would not be valid unless
he would and could obtain an annulment,
which he is unlikely to want to do
for your sake. Your parents are not
judging him as an individual soul,
but they are making a judgment about
the situation as something much too
fraught with uncertainty and harm.
Mary Ann
|
|
|
