Dear Ginger,
First, sorry for not getting back to you sooner.
I feel for your situation. First, I would also encourage you to find a compassionate priest who can hear your Confession.
Tell him about your situation and get some advice. If he doesn't provide much, seek out another priest who is faithful to the Church until you get some good advice on how to handle your father. Ask the priest what ministries he has that you can get involved in. Getting involved is a quick, great way to meet new people, some, who may understand where you are coming from.
Going to Mass is a commandment because it is spiritually good for us and what is spiritually good for us has a good effect on our overall well-being. The graces we receive from going to Mass each Sunday help us see the world from a more clear, Catholic view and give us the graces to follow through on being a good Christian example. That said, go to Confession first and share with the priest times you have not been to Mass or have committed any other serious sins.
Second, read either:
and don't forget to read about the Early Church Fathers!
Learn more here:
My colleagues may have more to add, but this is my two cents.
I hope this helps,
Mike
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