Hi Mary,

The Sacrament of Matrimony and the Eucharist are two entirely different Sacraments. Hence, the marriage will indeed be Sacramental.

However, I am not sure why one or even both person(s) not being confirmed would preclude a Mass at the wedding.

Those who are not confirmed are still welcome to Eucharist. This does not seem to make sense to me.

• Is there some information we are missing?

John

Hi Mary —

I too am confused — this does not make sense.

• What has Confirmation to do with the ability to assist at Mass and receive Holy Communion?

I suspect there is more to this.

• Has the fiancée not been baptized?

That would alter the situation.

Terry

Mary,

Given the question as it appears, though there is no Mass, it still is a valid, sacramental marriage.

Within the Roman Catholic Tradition, the couple confers the Sacrament on each other. The priest is simply the witness for the community.

Normally, when two Catholics marry, it is within the context of a wedding Mass. When a Catholic marries a non-Catholic, who is a validly baptized Christian, normally it is within the context of a ceremony. It is also a sacramental marriage.

When a Catholic marries a non-baptized person, it must be within a ceremony, and cannot be within the Mass. It is a valid, but not a sacramental marriage.

Confirmation should be done by a Catholic before they get married, but it is not mandated.
It does not affect the validity of the Sacrament of the Marriage.

I suspect there may be more to the situation than we are getting, however.

Fr. Nick

Dear Mary,

I agree with John and Terry — some needed information seems to be missing. However, let's clear up a few things, right away, that are stated or implied in the question:

• Is this a sacrament(al) or a civil marriage?

First things first. It is never ever merely a civil marriage if a Catholic priest is the principal witness [officiating or marrying] the couple. While the Catholic priest does also represent the state in a marriage, and thus the couple is legally married, the fact that the couple has come to the Catholic Church in the person of the bishop (in this case, the bishop's representative, — the priest), and is being married "in the Church", the marriage is valid and sacramental.

• What does it take for a marriage to be sacramental?

The marriage of two baptized Christians (not just Catholics) in the presence of the Church's minister, i.e. — official witnesses [bishop, priest, deacon] or with permission and a dispensation from the local bishop:

• another member of the clergy from another Church, like an Orthodox priest, or
• Protestant minister, and
• in rare situations, again with a dispensation and permission from the bishop, even a Justice of the Peace

can act as the Church's witness.

Any marriage attempted by a baptized Catholic with anyone, without the Church's blessing. etc. is not only not sacramental, but is not valid either — it is not even a marriage. Thus, a Catholic marrying a Protestant with a minister without the Church's blessing, etc. is not in a sacramental or valid marriage. A Catholic marrying in front of a Justice of the Peace, without any contact with, or dispensation from, the Church is not validly married in the eyes of the Church.

A baptized Christian (Catholic, etc.) marrying a non-Christian with the Church's blessing is entering a non sacramental but valid marriage in the eyes of the Church.

Baptism, thus, is the key. Baptism changes everything. The person becomes a "new creation", and from the moment of Baptism is "in Christ". Now, the Sacrament of Marriage is based on Christ's union, through His Death and Resurrection, with His Bride, the Church. A baptized man and a baptized woman entering into marriage thus signify, and make present this loving union between Christ and His Bride, the Church.

Confirmation, while not absolutely necessary in order to be married in the Church, is essential if one is to be fully initiated into the Church! In other words, one need not be confirmed in order to be married (a very common question) but one needs to be confirmed in order to be fully a Catholic! (Sadly, a rare question.) The sealing of the Holy Spirit in Confirmation perfects the new Life given in Baptism, and strengthens the confirmed with the Gifts of the Holy Spirit for discipleship, and thus, for any vocation arising from this — for example, Holy Matrimony.

Finally, while sadly, many couples do not see any value in a Nuptial Mass (a wedding at Mass),
it remains the fundamental form of the Rite of Holy Matrimony. A wedding ceremony, while valid and sacramental, is not expressing the fullness of what is taking place.

• Why?

Because as the couple are expressing their own undying and faithful love for each other, and thus signifying and making present the spousal love of Christ and His Bride the Church, "sealing" the wedding ceremony within the Eucharist reveals, expresses, and communicates the depths of the Sacred Mysteries, where each spouse now with Christ can say to Christ, first and then to each other, "This is My Body" and are nourished with the Bridegroom's Real Flesh and Blood at the Marriage Feast of the Lamb, Jesus Christ.

Not having the Eucharist at the wedding does not make the marriage non-sacramental or invalid, but it does limit its full expression.

The source and summit of Christian life is the Eucharist. Just as a baptized Catholic is not fully Catholic without Confirmation (given once), a baptized Catholic is not fully Catholic, if they do not participate in the Eucharist, in a regular, at least weekly, way!

Jesus Himself said:

"if you do not eat My Flesh and Drink My Blood, you have no life in you." John 6:53

Father Francis