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Marie Ann Thompson wrote:

Hi, guys —

I am a Catholic from a traditional Catholic family. I want to marry a person born in a non-Christian family. He is ready to convert and follow the religion but both of our families don't approve of this.

We are in love with each other and wish to live together according to the will of God and want to marry and have many kids.

  • Will God approve of this?

Marie Ann

  { Though our families disapproves, will God approve if I marry a non-Catholic and have a family? }

Eric replied:

Marie Ann,

There is no reason for God to disapprove of what you're doing based on what you've told us. (I am assuming both of you are adults.)

There may be other issues involved — marriage is a complicated issue — or there may not be, but marrying a converting non-Christian is not one of them. Hopefully though he is converting sincerely, because he truly believes, and not just going through the motions to please you (or your family).

Maybe their concern is rooted in this; I don't know. As long as you both consent, and get married in the Church and are open to children, God will approve. Of course, you still have to live with your family's objections, which is another issue.

Eric

Marie Ann replied:

Eric,

We are both adults; I am 23-years-old and he is 29-years-old. I still feel like I will be going against God's Will if I do not obey my parents. Going against them is making me feel deeply guilty.

Also, both my parents really liked him when I introduced him as a friend and was supportive of our friendship, but after a few months, when I told them I wish to marry him, they were totally against it. They said if I do this, no one among our family, relatives or society, will support it.

My mom even said I am going against God's will because God hates mixed marriages. She showed me some bible verses to prove it so I am confused. I don't want to go against the Will of God but I deeply love this guy and believe that he is the one for me.

Marie Ann

Eric replied:

Marie Ann,

  • Is he converting to Catholicism or not?

If he is, it is not a mixed marriage, not in the Catholic canonical sense anyway. Maybe you mean an inter-racial marriage? In which case, this is definitely not against Catholic teaching or against the Bible, despite the verses they are throwing at you. (Those verses likely apply only to Jews during the Old Testament. Period.) Again, because you're an adult, there is nothing wrong or sinful about going against your parents' wishes on this particular issue; however, it may not be wise or prudent for you to do so, from a practical standpoint. That is up to you to decide, and it is a judgment call. We can only offer advice on what the faith tells us. We can't really offer life counseling. In any case, I assure you that the issue is with your parents, and not with you. They are trying to use God to impose their will on you which is not a good thing.

If they want to claim that it is against God's will, have them go through the Catechism of the Catholic Church and provide evidence of this from this official teaching document.

They won't find it.

So there is absolutely no justification for you to feel guilty about this.

Eric

Bob replied:

Marie Ann,

Get a priest to be an advocate for both of you. Your parents may treat you like a child, but I assure you, they won't treat a priest the same way.

Peace,

Bob Kirby

Marie Ann replied:


Thank you all for your replies.

It was really helpful!

Marie Ann

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