Bringing you the
"Good News" of Jesus Christ
and His Church While PROMOTING CATHOLIC
Apologetic Support groups loyal to the Holy Father and Church's
magisterium
If you want some books, it would
depend on what kind of questions
you have and what you want to learn.
If you want CDs, Saint Joseph Communications has
good CDs, especially Scott Hahn's
material.
It helps you and supports our web
site a bit as well.
Hope this helps,
Mike
Stefan
replied:
Thanks for
all the web pages references.
I was a bit vague on the real issue I was interested in, so I'll be a bit more direct.
I have a male friend who has recently
told me he may be romantically interested
in another man.
He seems confident about it, although
he's feigning to be confused. I think
he is gay.
I understand the Church's stance
on this is fairly strict. I just
don't know what to think.
He's always been a good Christian.
He doesn't seem to be acknowledging
how this affects his beliefs. I don't know if it's even wrong
or right.
If he seems happy about
it, should I be happy for him
too, or remind him that the Bible,
condemns this decision?
Thank you for your time and
consideration for this question.
Stefan
Eric
replied:
Hi, Stefan —
Thanks for following up.
This issue must be treated with great
pastoral sensitivity and care.
On
the one hand, homosexual acts, we
believe, are intrinsically wrong
and can never be accepted.
On the
other hand, the inclination, while
intrinsically disordered, is not
sinful.
In other words, a man with
same sex attraction is not thereby
going to Hell unless he actually
acts, knowingly, deliberately, and
unrepentantly, on his desires.
Much is made about whether people
are born with this inclination or
not. Some are adamant that they are
and cannot help it. Others are equally
insistent that it is learned. In
my opinion, I am familiar with both
cases. In any case, this does not
affect it's morality; people can
be born with afflictions such as:
alcoholism
kleptomania
psychopathy,
or
pedophilia; this does not give
them free reign to satisfy their
desires.
The Church's teaching (following
the teaching of Christ) is expressed
mainly in two places:
2357 Homosexuality refers to relations
between men or between women who
experience an exclusive or predominant
sexual attraction toward persons
of the same sex. It has taken
a great variety of forms through
the centuries and in different
cultures. Its psychological genesis
remains largely unexplained. Basing
itself on Sacred Scripture, which
presents homosexual acts as acts
of grave depravity, (cf. Genesis 19:1-29; Romans 1:24-27; 1 Corinthians 6:10; 1 Timothy 1:10) tradition
has always declared that homosexual
acts are intrinsically disordered.(Congregation for the Doctrine of the faith, Persona humana 8) They are contrary to the natural
law. They close the sexual act
to the gift of life. They do not
proceed from a genuine affective
and sexual complementarity. Under
no circumstances can they be approved.
2358 The number of men and women
who have deep-seated homosexual
tendencies is not negligible.
This inclination, which is objectively
disordered, constitutes for most
of them a trial. They must be
accepted with respect, compassion,
and sensitivity. Every sign of
unjust discrimination in their
regard should be avoided. These
persons are called to fulfill
God's will in their lives and,
if they are Christians, to unite
to the sacrifice of the Lord's
Cross the difficulties they may
encounter from their condition.
2359 Homosexual persons are called
to chastity. By the virtues of
self-mastery that teach them inner
freedom, at times by the support
of disinterested friendship, by
prayer and sacramental grace, they can and should gradually
and resolutely approach Christian
perfection.
The key to understanding Christ's
teaching on homosexuality is to understand
Christ's teaching on Marriage. Marriage
is an icon of God's relationship
with us. Christ, the Eternal Other,
is the Bridegroom, and his Church
is the Bride. He is the male principle,
who imparts life to his spouse; the
Church is the female principle, who
receives the divine life, conceives
and bears fruit.
The human body is designed in such
a way as to express this mystery,
and to unite husband and wife together
into one flesh. To be somewhat blunt,
conjugal love is not about entertaining
yourself, nor is it about how you
feel (I am being delicate here).
What you feel is important, but it
would be as wrong (if not more so)
to indulge in sex just for that reason
as it would be to eat purely for
the taste. It's like eating the whipped
cream or butter only without eating
the food it normally sits on.
The purpose of conjugal love, from
a strictly biological perspective,
is for reproduction.
This doesn't mean that every act
has to be exclusively reproductive. Only that
it has to be, according to its nature,
open to reproduction. The other purpose
of conjugal union, which is psychic,
is the union of the two spouses.
The love of husband for wife is intended
to be united together to conceive
a third person so that third
person is the fruit of their love.
This imitates the divine economy
where Christ the Bridegroom gives
His divine Life to the Church who
conceives and bears fruit the fruit
of holiness. Thus any sex act, homosexual
or heterosexual, which is not both
unitive (uniting the spouses) and
procreative (open to life in its
nature, that is, where fertility
is not deliberately thwarted), is
immoral.
This is certainly a difficult situation
for people with same-sex attraction
(SSA), particularly if it is exclusive.
But we must obey Christ. It's a heroic
act. (And let's not forget that the
homosexual lifestyle is very self-destructive
psychologically and health-wise.)
Often SSA is rooted in a shame and
a broken relationship with the father
growing up during key periods in
one's life. The man with SSA fails
to fully identify with his father
due to a trauma of some sort. Boys
want, more than anything, to be like
their fathers and have their approval.
When one or both of these situations
is thwarted by shame imparted by
the father, and, typically, when the son is of a sensitive temperament,
he is often ripe for SSA.
Dr.
Joseph Nicolosi RIP (1947 - 2017) had a
lot of success in treating individuals
with SSA. He said about:
30% of clients become functional
heterosexuals
30% receive some remission of
SSA, and
30% receive no remission from
SSA.
Best wishes,
Eric
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