Dear H.,

To answer your question, we shouldn't stay with a church because we were brought up in it;
we should stay in a Church because it was established by God for the sake of our salvation. Conversely, we shouldn't go to a church because:

• it makes us feel good
• the ministers smile, or
• the people are nice

but we should go to a Church that has the fullness of Truth and Grace which are the means of our salvation won for us by Christ. Perhaps the better question to ask is:

• What can I give to it?
  
  rather than
  
  
• What can I can I get from it?

You have mentioned several things that are wrong with the human element in the Church today, some of which I wouldn't disagree with.

The question, though, is, do we remain and try to improve this element in the body of Christ, or do we abandon the Church Christ established upon on the rock of Peter and the Apostles, to join the descendents of a people who did just that in the 16th century — abandoned the Church that Christ established. Jesus prayed for unity in John Chapter 17 so that all Christians would be one; but because of sin, it is now splintered. Joining splinter groups that do not have the authority of Christ in their priesthood or sacraments (including the Eucharist), and have a limited understanding of the role of Mary and the saints in the family of God, will not satisfy the internal desires you have for eternal life.

Another thing to consider is the wisdom of God versus the wisdom of the world. It is always safe to trust that God's wisdom is much higher than our own. Because other denominations might be closer to the spirit of the age, in some things, certainly isn't a legitimate reason to feel comfortable with them. In fact, often it is not a good sign.

Finally, if you feel your parish is not filling your legitimate needs, you are free to look into other Catholic parishes in your area. I have found that some parishes are very alive and vibrant while others need more help in certain areas.

My advice is to do some research in this area.

God bless,

Paul

Dear H. —

It is sad that you felt you were forced into a faith. It appears your Confirmation catechesis was done very poorly.

Because of the importance of Baptism for our salvation, the Church, since Apostolic times has always baptized infants. All parents only want what is best for their new child and since the child cannot speak for themselves, the faith of the parents speak for the child at their Baptism. Later at Confirmation, the teenager confirms the choice their parents made for them at their Baptism.

When there is poor catechesis of the faith within the family, situations can arise where devout Catholic parents end up telling their children, Just do what I say., without explaining the reasons behind their religious practices. This can repel children and give them an attitude, similar to the one you have expressed.

That said, you can't undo the past but you can let go of any grudges you hold against the manner in which your parents brought you up.

I would encourage you to stop by your Catholic parish when it is open, but no one is there and ask the Lord where He wants you to serve him in his Church. It may or may not be at this parish.

Like my colleague Paul said, take a look at other Catholic parishes as well.

Find out what ministries each offers and find one that interests you.

Hope this helps,

Mike