The Church does not and cannot address individual family situations and related nuanced problems that arise from within the family. The Church with Christ does establish faith and moral guidelines by which He calls them to follow.
If the person is disbursing the estate in an unjust manner, they will be accountable for their actions at theirParticular Judgment. [CCC]
That person's Judgment is none of our business. We should focus on our words and actions and ensure they are in line with Catholic Christian values.
Only Jesus, the Just Judge, can answer the three bulleted questions in your e-mail.