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Anonymous Will wrote:

Hi, guys —

  • How can my Catholic girlfriend and I get past our different beliefs on certain religious issues?

I have been dating a very devoted Catholic woman for a little over a year. She is the kindest, most joyful person I have ever met, and every part of our relationship is incredible and strong. However, I have been a Baptist all my life and truly believe in that faith. We share a strong bond of our love for Jesus and the morals we have been taught through His Teachings. We have always acknowledged our differences in faith, but we never really talked about what that would actually mean for us down the road.

My intentions are to marry this girl in the future (We are both in our early 20s.) and hopefully raise a faithful family. I regularly attend Mass with her and I have spent the last few months learning more and more about the Catholic Church. I understand a marriage would likely take place in a Catholic Church with a Catholic priest and I respect that. I also know that I will have to allow my future children to be baptized Catholic, which I may also support. However, recently we have really been struggling with one big difference between her Catholic beliefs and my Baptist beliefs:

She feels as though there could be a gap between us because I do not share in her belief of the Eucharist or, as I would call it, the Lord's Supper. It is of huge importance to her faith, and I am not able to stand with her in that. I try to insure her that we can still worship Jesus together, but it is almost seeming like a dooming factor for our relationship.

  • Is there any advice or prayers that could help us through this hard subject?

Any advice on other Catholic beliefs would also be welcomed. I just want to understand her and support her in her walk. We love each other too much to not try to find a way.

Thank you for any help.


  { How can my Catholic girlfriend and I get past our different beliefs on certain religious issues? }

Eric replied:


In terms of advice, I would say cultivate radical humility (always a good policy for anything!).

In terms of prayer, I'd say sincerely ask the Lord to lead you to the truth about the Catholic faith and the Eucharist (or, if you prefer, the Lord's Supper). Open your heart to know the fullness of truth, as you opened your heart to Jesus, who is The Truth. Promise Jesus you'll go wherever he leads you — no matter how difficult. Hopefully, these are the kind of prayers you'd be willing to pray without first accepting any Catholic beliefs.

You have tellingly not asked for any explanations of the Eucharist or any reasons why we believe it, nor have you asked us to clarify any difficulties or doubts you have, so I'm not going to furnish you with information that you don't want. If you do in fact want to discuss your objections, we'd be happy to charitably address those.

If you want further advice, I'd encourage you to exercise your critical thinking skills and examine your own beliefs and why you believe them, and the historical basis of the Christian faith.

  • What is the history of the Baptist view of the Lord's Supper?
  • Why did Lutherans accept the Real Presence, but Baptists did not, even though both were Scripture Alone Christians?
  • Why do all the ancient churches (including churches that split off in the 5th century) agree on the teaching on the Eucharist?
  • What early historical sources do we have articulating the Christian view of the Eucharist?

These are just a few of the questions you could investigate.


Mike replied:

Dear Will,

In addition to Eric's excellent reply, check out these additional postings where we have addressed and answered similar questions.

Also check out our contemplating becoming a Catholic section where we have over 12 pages of interesting questions and dialogue.

I hope this helps,


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