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Emmett Crocker wrote: |
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Hi, guys —
I have been doing well in pushing away lustful thoughts but I’m still dealing with some scruples.
I went to the park with my kids and a bunch of minorities showed up and kind of swarmed the play area. I then had some thoughts of racial stereotypes that would be considered prejudice, like a rash judgement feeling.
I’m not sure if I prayed for the thoughts to go away but I know I didn't say or do anything to offend these people.
Sometimes I get prejudicial thoughts when I see lower income people in general or welfare types and I was wondering how to avoid this.
I don't like these thoughts but they come, kind of automatically, and I'm working on it.
- How do I let go of the anxiety that I am possibly sinning in my thoughts?
I don't want these thoughts.
- Also are prejudice thoughts, on the same level as lustful thoughts, or are they not grave matter unless you act on them?
Thanks,
Emmett C.
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| { How do I let go of the anxiety that I'm sinning in my thoughts and do you take donations? } |
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Eric replied:
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Emmett,
Temptations are not sinful, but if you accept them and entertain them as thoughts, they can become sinful. I don't think such thoughts would be mortally sinful unless they involved violence or hatred (or maybe extreme anger) . . . certainly not if you do not will them. To some degree, it is typical for people to feel different about those outside their race. It's part of the human condition.
When I have untoward feelings toward certain racial groups, I pray to St. Martin de Porres for help, who was black and discriminated against. We can also pray for the people we are having feelings toward, that God would bless them and grant them salvation. This exerts "back pressure" on the demons, if they are responsible for our temptations, and it shows love and good-will to counteract the thoughts. It's a good opportunity to cultivate humility as well, recalling that we are broken and imperfect and do irrational things.
Rather than praying for the thoughts to "go away", I'd pray for a deeper love of, and compassion toward, all people, regardless of race and economic condition. You might even consider, if you find yourself resenting them as an economic burden, counteracting this by making a donation to a good charity that serves them. Of course, if we find that we are cultivating or engaging these temptations, we can bring them to the sacrament of Reconciliation for healing.
Maybe volunteering at a charity that serves them or finding some opportunity to know these folks personally and see them as real people is a long-term way to chip away at prejudice.
Eric |
Emmett replied:
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Eric,
That helps put things into perspective for me.
Thank you!
I will take these suggestions to heart and check out St. Martin de Porres. I have never heard of him.
- Also, do you guys take donations?
I checked but didn't see any option.
Emmett
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Mike replied:
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Hi, Emmett —
Let me give you a more general answer.
You said:
Sometimes I get prejudicial thoughts when I see lower income people in general or welfare types and I was wondering how to avoid this.
I don't like these thoughts but they come, kind of automatically, and I'm working on it.
- How do I let go of the anxiety that I am possibly sinning in my thoughts?
I don't want these thoughts.
Throughout life we are bombarded with good thoughts by our Lord and his angels, and by bad thoughts from Satan and his evil ones. Our goal is to keep in mind this battle is happening and just do the best we can to keep a clean Christian mind set. Stay close to the sacraments and keep a strong prayer life, knowing that there's a spiritual warfare going on from the time we are baptized to our Particular Judgment.
You said:
- Also, do you guys take donations?
I should probably market this portion of the site better but if anyone wishes to support our volunteer organization, (We are NOT a non-profit.), and read the feedback we have received from visitors/questioners to our site, they can do so here:
Mike
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Emmett replied:
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Thanks, guys —
If you don’t mind, I had another situation I wanted to ask.
I work at the post office and for 10 years I've always used one earbud in my ear for music/podcasts when I wasn't talking to anyone on the route, and I was alone.
I never thought much about it even though I knew it was against the rules because our local management never cared or enforced them.
Recently we have been hearing that upper high management has been cracking down on earbuds and disciplining carriers by taking them off the street and making them go to retraining in a non-pay status for a week or longer.
- After hearing this, I was wearing my earbuds on my route and thought, “Oh no”, what if it’s a mortal sin to disobey this rule?
So, I took my earbud out and haven’t used it at work since. I will mention disobeying rules at work in my next Confession, but I am wondering, if I am in mortal sin now and have received the Eucharist unworthily.
- Any thoughts on if this is:
- grave matter or
- just imprudent behavior?
Thanks,
Emmett
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Eric replied:
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Emmett,
It's not a mortal sin. You're being a bit scrupulous about it. At most it’s a venial sin. I am not sure what the reason is for the rule. It's probably for your own safety, so you are aware of your surroundings, or maybe also to be attentive to customers.
Confess it, give up the habit (try prayer instead, like the Rosary (how to, history), and don't worry about it.
Eric
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Emmett replied:
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Eric,
It’s mainly a safety rule. I appreciate the help.
I just got help from my psychologist today on the worry and anxiety so that’s going to help. I will confess and break this habit for the good of everyone.
Thanks Eric!
God bless you all!
Emmett |
Emmett followed-up later:
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I just wanted to send you a small follow-up.
I usually do good to avoid encouraging or changing the subject but I was speaking with my dad and brother about a coworker who has a rich girlfriend and my dad said, “Some people go for that.”, like you know “who” over here at my work, and my brother and I both asked “who”, and he said who it was and we know him — he’s dating my rich aunt who is divorced.
- Was there any grave matter here or when do you think detraction rises to the level of mortal sin?
Emmett |
Eric replied:
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Emmett
- Did you consult your confessor?
Eric
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Emmett replied:
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No Sir,
I’m having trouble with going back to Confession right now because I have a bunch of stuff from 10 plus years ago. I don’t know if these sins are mortal sins or not and spent a lot of time confessing stuff before my conversion, so I am waiting a while before I go back to Confession because of the anxiety.
Basically last time I went, I dumped a ton of past remembered stuff on the priest and he keeps telling to try to not go back into the past, but I tend to always confess past remembered sins just in case there were any mortal sins. I’m stuck in a conundrum, probably because I converted at 24 and I was Baptist before so I didn't learn about mortal sins until my conversion to the Catholic faith.
Emmett |
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